The First Trimester
Today I'm 16 weeks along!
I'm officially in the second trimester and I have pretty much no energy... But tomorrow we find out the gender of our lil' babe! I thought I'd write down some thoughts and feelings (so many feelings) about how my pregnancy has gone before it all becomes a distant memory (the hard parts at least, pls pray for that).
My work had their Christmas party in early December and my period was laaatteee. A few times that night I thought "hmm, that really should've been happening by now", but nothin'. It was an overnight party at a cabin, so the next morning when we got home I was ready to jump in the shower. Then I had the thought to take a pregnancy test... Problem was I had just relieved myself a little bit earlier and had only one test left. I took it anyway and showered thinking what a dumb decision it was to waste a $10 test on pretty much nothing. Well it definitely wasn't nothing :). I walked straight out of the shower to Coby (eating Ramen on the couch #classy #idon'tcook) and gave him the test. I'd done the cute "reveal" before and that didn't really work out so #authentic! He probably preferred it this way anyway. It worked! Science! Heaven! Babies!
Let me pause right here to say that anytime there's a new baby I think holy wow. We are so so so so lucky. And so grateful. And if you're having a hard time with fertility I am so sorry and I'm here to listen and love you.
Again, we are so grateful. But man, pregnancy has been a learning curve! Nothing too crazy, but enough so that Coby is a good sport for listening to me talk about every little symptom I develop.
Speaking of which, my boobs are giant. Let's just get that out of the way first thing. I wish I could adequately explain the sheer weight of them. But I will spare you. I want to say that this "symptom" is a good thing, but knowing they are only going to grow from here is actually a little frustrating. Because BODY IMAGE YOU GUYS. It's a thing. And sometimes it's really hard. For the most part I'm pretty good about letting that stuff go. But I have my moments. Upside? I take a bath pretty much every other night. It's my favorite part of any day! Marnie hangs out with me and I read and unwind from the day. One time I had a cold lemonade to accompany me and I could've cried it was so good.
Let's talk nausea. I'm average. Let's say that. It hasn't been exactly smooth sailing, but a few friends have had it a lot worse than me. I got sick fast (turns out I was measuring further along than I thought), and quickly learned throwing up isn't my favorite thing. I swear I went through food withdrawals those first two weeks though. I LOVE FOOD. Do you know what I don't love? Force feeding myself crackers or pretzels or fishy crackers every two hours. Taco Bell is a godsend. As are sour candies (must be Coby's baby!). But don't even talk about ramen of any kind or I will lose it. I can't even look at certain days of photos from our Hawaii trip without feeling sick because of ramen! With that, I've learned I'm a very sensory person. I mean I knew this, but it's become a little OCD. Once we went to an event and someone was talking about food and I had to run to the restroom to throw up. Coby picked his nose and I threw up. I thought about a wounded puppy and I threw up. You get the picture. But it's this weird cough, hack thing until I get there? Anyway, I have yet to understand cravings because everything is an aversion. I eat only what I think I can keep down. It's a lot better now but I was pretty worried there for a hot second. Luckily by the time I was able to get medication it wasn't as severe so I have yet to use that. I mean, I say it's not too much of a problem anymore, when in reality I still throw up once or twice a week. Anyway, I'm over this topic. Moving on!
I've had sciatica before I was pregnant, but when I was about 9 weeks I tweaked something and couldn't walk for at least a day! Coby had to lower me into my nightly bathtub and wow that pain is some of the weirdest pain. I like to equate it to getting a sprained ankle. It's not the worst thing in the world, and if you tweak your foot it almost feels good? But it's definitely there and you definitely feel it. I still have little tinges every so often, but it's subsided big time.
Research. I love researching! Information helps me feel better about things. My mom is definitely this way too. I've already read a few books and have 6 or 7 pregnancy apps on my phone. I love any mommy blog I can get my hands on and want to talk to anyone and everyone about their experiences. Let me think if there's anything else... I haven't really exercised and have low low energy so I know I need to. My OB and hospital are awesome. And I'm super pumped for birth! I'm learning a lot about pain management techniques and my perspective is totally changing. I'm more nervous (terrified?) for nursing and the first two months than I am labor.
Luckily Coby is the best human to have around, I have never felt so happy and catch myself multiple times a day feeling grateful for him. I can honestly say that this is the happiest time of my life and he is a huge part of that. Trying to soak in "us" while we can!
I think that's it! Love you lil' babe! <3