whew. whatta day. whatta day.  started off in a funk.  then got worse.  only i was sorta prepared.  and things are piecing together.  and i'm wondering if there was a reason i've been so down in the depths lately, i feel like it was necessary for me to feel as crappy as i have been the last little while so i could empathize.  it's weird.  and it's like i am the way i am (body wise) to protect myself from this specific reason.  anyway.  i played in todays game, woot woot.  and funny thing was i didn't know if i would be able to handle it with everything going on.  and i rocked at serve receive and sucked at defense because my head was all messed up and i couldn't think from previous mentioned reasons.  because usually its the complete opposite: i suck in serve receive because i'm overanalyzing everything, and rock at defense because i can read the ball, blockers, and hitters so well.  sorry this is all super vague.  but it's personal.  it's not all about me, and my trials are nothing compared to anyone else's. "and if though shall endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high" D&C 121:7.  I'm just going to stop being selfish and depressed about myself, for I have to be strong for others who are truly enduring a trial.  not to discount any smaller trials, just to put them into perspective :)
i know i'm better suited for endurance.
in running
in relationships
in my own emo-ness
in life.

"able, to bear it, able, to bear it bear it!"